# Subtitled list monologue — rebuild sheet

One woman in her own kitchen, talking straight to the phone for 54 seconds, reading off a list of things nobody warned her about getting older — no product, no cutaways, no pinned headline, just her speech burned in as captions. 204,667 views · 11,370 likes · by pinkynel.

**Why it works** — The captions never pin a promise; they accumulate, so each beat hands the viewer one more thing to recognise in themselves ("Then there's…", "…either"), and a list the viewer keeps agreeing with is a list they stay for. One running metaphor — she's an old freighter, barnacles and all — turns a complaint reel into a bit, and the post caption converts the recognition straight into comments: "Got anything to add to the list?"

**The beats**

| Time | What happens | On-screen text |
|---|---|---|
| 4.33s | Chest-up handheld frame, speaker in her kitchen talking to the lens. Fridge with magnets over her left shoulder, wood cabinets top-left, tiled floor. Flat indoor daylight. | you're not |
| 13.0s | Same frame, same room, same wardrobe. Slightly wider — a small clip-on mic is visible on her shirt. | Turns out getting older is the same thing |
| 21.67s | Same frame, drifted a little right; a doorframe appears at frame right. Hand moving low in frame. | Yeah little bit up here but the big surprise down there |
| 30.34s | Same frame; right hand raised beside her head, index finger up — the one real gesture in the sampled beats. | Then there's this constant ring in your ears and barnacles all over your |
| 39.0s | Same frame, mid-word, hands out of frame. | I'm like an old freighter now that's been in the ocean for too long |
| 47.67s | Same frame to the end; watch hand drifting into the lower frame. | you feel like you never wantto have sex again either |

Captions are transcribed exactly as burned in, including the run-together "wantto" at 47.67s.

**What the frames do not show** — Six stills across 54 seconds can't prove the take is unbroken; there is no visible cut between any two sampled beats, but cuts could sit between them. There is no audio here, so nothing outside the burned-in captions is known. The first 4.3 seconds are not sampled, and the first caption ("you're not") is already mid-sentence — **the actual opening hook is not in evidence**, so a rebuild has to write its own. No product appears at any point.

**What carries the value** — The accumulating list. Each caption adds one more indignity the viewer recognises, hung on one running metaphor (the barnacled old freighter), and the payoff is the viewer supplying item seven in the comments. There is nothing visual to carry it — the frame is deliberately dead. This one does not rebuild without a performer who can write and land the list.

**Shoot it**

- **Camera:** phone front camera at arm's length, chest-up, square-on, roughly eye level. One framing for the whole runtime — small handheld drift is fine and reads as real; a zoom, a reframe or a cutaway breaks the format. No second angle, no B-roll.
- **Room:** their own kitchen or equivalent lived-in room, with real background clutter (fridge magnets, a note, counter appliances). Do not dress it.
- **Light:** flat, even, ambient indoor daylight. No key light, no ring light, no grade.
- **Wardrobe:** ordinary everyday clothes — here a patterned collared shirt, glasses, a wristwatch. Nothing styled for camera. A small clip-on lav mic is visible in frame and does not hurt it.
- **Performance:** one take to the lens, conversational, list order escalating; one gesture at most. The list needs a hard opening line (the source's is not in evidence) and a running metaphor that carries the last third.
- **Text:** burn the speech in as captions — one clause per beat, centred lower third, bold white on a solid pink highlight box, replaced every beat, never pinned.
- **Post caption:** state the premise and ask for additions — the source's is "Nobody tells you this about aging. Got anything to add to the list?"

**Or generate it**

```
vertical 9:16 photograph, {SUBJECT} standing in their own domestic kitchen, framed
chest-up at arm's length and roughly eye level, square-on, talking straight to the
lens mid-sentence; behind them a stainless french-door fridge with a few magnets and
a small green note, wood upper cabinets at the top left, a pale doorframe at frame
right, a counter with small appliances and a tiled floor below; a small black clip-on
mic on the shirt placket; flat even indoor daylight, no key light and no styling,
phone-camera look, slight grain, no retouching, no on-screen text; no {PRODUCT} in
frame at any point
```

*Motion:* handheld at arm's length, holding the same chest-up framing for the whole beat with only small drift — no zoom, no reframe, no cutaway; only the speaker's face and one raised hand move.

*Text overlay pattern:* one clause of speech per beat, centred lower third, bold white on a solid pink highlight box, one to three lines, replaced on every beat and never pinned —
`{opening clause, already mid-sentence}` → `Turns out {the premise}` → `{item 1}` → `Then there's {item 2}` → `I'm like {the running metaphor} now` → `you feel like {last item} either`

**Reference:** https://www.instagram.com/p/DW825RBugUe/
